Bland, Slimy, and Annoying

Why is it that every time I see or hear the disposable sounds of the Grammy-nominated Backstreet Boys, I get this uncontrollable craving for a big ol’ mayonnaise and Velveeta sandwich on white bread? Has anyone else had this problem?

While I’m at it, does anyone else find this whole boy band thing to be a big insult to such classic boy bands as the Osmonds or New Kids on the Block? And has anyone else accidentally caught Joey McIntyre on one of his recent VH-1/MTV guest appearances and wondered at what a slimewad he seems to have become?

Speaking of slimewads, has anyone visited Cybersocket lately? I don’t recommend it; it’s a stupid publication with an ugly website. Even better, it features misleading descriptions of sites. Holy Titclamps, for example, is a “celebrity gossip” site while Planet SOMA is a big promoter of “queer culture”. I love the way that professional homosexuals try to re-work the universe to fit their narrow view thereof. If anything, my site’s function is to convince the world what a complete crock of shit the idea of “queer culture” is.

The above would be worth a brief chuckle if these assholes also didn’t keep spamming me (six messages yesterday) and telling me it wasn’t spam because I’d signed up for their “mailing list” Of course, this is bullshit, since the spam comes to specific addresses they harvested from my site and don’t use otherwise. It’s idiots like these who are responsible for the fact that I don’t have direct email links on the site anymore.

Other things I hate today, dammit:

  • All versions of Microsloth Word released after version 5.1 for Mac in 1992. It’s been downhill ever since for this increasingly bloated piece of crap which now does just about everything badly, except for word processing, which it barely seems to do at all.
  • A 15% price increase on Sausage McMuffins.
  • Radio stations with formats like “smooth jazz”, “new country”, and “the hits of the 70s and 80s with no rap, metal, or spontaneity”. OK, I made up the “spontaneity” part.
  • Those stupid “people do” Chevron commercials (still).

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