Find a City

Not that I’m committing to any radical course of action in the face of my current disillusionment, but I find myself scoping other cities with increasing frequency. Any comments (particularly from people who live or have lived in any of these places) are most welcome. First, some of the criteria:

Type of City:

I fancy a fairly large place (in the 500,000 to 1,000,000 population range) just because these cities tend to be more interesting and diverse, and have bonuses like working transit, a variety of bars and restaurants, etc. I do, however, want a place where having a car is not a complete nightmare. I do in fact have a bias for older (perhaps even decaying) industrial-type cities. One bedroom apartments in the $500 range are a plus. Cheaper ones are a much bigger plus. Some job options might be nice too…

Geography:

Proximity to the Family is increasingly important; I’d like to be within a day’s drive from home. This rules out the west coast. Having a river, lake, or other large body of water IN the city is pretty essential as well, for aesthetic reasons rather than recreational ones. A variety of fairly close road trip destinations is just as important. I don’t particularly mind cold weather, or even some snow, although these are not “must haves”. I really hate hot summers.

Ruled out from the start:

Cute college towns, gentrified yuppie meccas, and relatively suburban boomtowns (Houston, Denver, Charlotte) hold no appeal whatsoever. Neither do congested nightmares like Washington, New York, and Boston. Portland and Seattle are probably not options either, losing out only because of distance from the parents. Los Angeles and San Diego never were options, nor was the southwest or New England. And I will not move back to the south…no discussion allowed…

And now the short list (not that I’m planning to move or anything):

  • Chicago (visited in 1996 and 1997): A little big, a little pricey, and the summers (and winters) are brutal. But it’s a great place. I like the way it looks. I could spend several years exploring and not get bored. There are White Castles and cheap Indian restaurants, and bowling alleys which host bands, and the transit is good.
  • Detroit (visited once in 1997): Most people who know me realize I have an unhealthy obsession with Detroit. The climate sucks, there’s no transit to speak of, and the place can be down right scary. But I still like it. Canada’s just across the river. The cost of living is close to nothing. They have White Castles too…
  • Baltimore (most recent visit in 1997): I’ve visited pretty often and Baltimore has always intrigued me. No one seems to like the place except its residents. This is a big plus. It’s also close to New York, Philadelphia, and home, and not all that far from Chicago and Detroit. Could be an option…
  • Toronto (visited once in 1979): I don’t know about the logistics of moving to Canada. But I’d like to look around the place and see how it’s changed since my last visit nearly 20 years ago…
  • Oakland (just across the bay): I include Oakland simply because it’s where I WILL live if I stay in the Bay Area…
  • Minneapolis (visited once in 1996): Damn…talk about ugly winters… But I like the place and I have a fair number of friends there. It’s a little far from home and the road trip options are pretty much limited to Chicago, but they do have White Castles, so I’ll say Minneapolis has a slightly more than slight chance…
  • Pittsburgh (visited once in 1997): Another one with an outside chance. Great place, hugely industrial and working class feel. Lots of hills and rivers. But it’s a bit isolated and I fear for the nightlife options. Very possible, still…

The second tier: Cleveland, St. Louis, Philadelphia…

Suggestions, comments, job offers, and links to cool web sites are solicited. Not that I’m planning to move or anything…

North Carolina

Today brought visits to the relatives in Reidsville. This is always nice even though it means being trapped in a non-smoking environment for three hours or so, and I’m usually a bit edgy by the end. Now I get to go over to my aunt’s house and finish hooking up her new VCR. I’ll probably miss “The Simpsons” again…

 

I also did my traditional run downtown to see the shadows of what we had instead of malls when I was very young. I peered into the old stores, most of them closed and boarded up, and thought about the crowds which used to roam the streets, and Santa Claus at Meyer’s, and eating at the S&W Cafeteria, and movies at the Carolina Theatre, and popcorn at Kress’s. I’m sad that it’s all gone now, but at the same time glad that I’m just barely old enough to remember when downtown was still the center of things.

I may try to hit Myrtle Beach tomorrow. I lived there for four months eleven years ago. Haven’t been back since. It’s changed either dramatically or not at all, I’d imagine. We’ll see.

***

Seems my dad developed a serious kidney stone in honor of the Tour. Thus, my biggest single frame of reference for the Greensboro leg as been the emergency room at Cone Hospital. Spent pretty much all of Saturday there waiting for something to happen. Fortunately, surgery finally ensued with no complications and my dad is home and quite normal now. Except for the string. Let’s not discuss that…

So I got to relive another aspect of my childhood by hanging out at Cone Hospital. From about age four to age eight or so, I had an awful lot of relatives die there and I remember playing on the steps in front of the main entrance many nights while my parents worried. I finally found those steps again last night while prowling around looking for a smoking area. They look much smaller now.

 

In the process of lurking about the hospital staring at the cute orderlies and interns and reading all about the architecture of Pittsburgh, I managed to miss my cousin’s wedding. At least I was spared the repetitive “I guess your next” comments of my more distant and less savvy relatives.

As yet I haven’t gotten in contact with half the people I planned to, due in part to the above-mentioned semi-drama. I have one day left; it might be a bit tough now.

I did, however, run into several old friends by accident Friday night when I realized that I’d had it with fags and Babylon’s rave children and instead checked out the band at ZooBar. The drummer for the trio on stage turned out to be Roy, a former co-worker from Kinko’s. The sound “man” was his wife Emily. And then I ran into an old WUAG cohort, Lynn Blakey, and found out that her new band, Glory Fountain, had opened. CD received; review forthcoming. I’m prepared to like it.

So as not to be completely removed from queers, I checked out opening night at the new bar in town, the Jokers 3. This is actually a straight club which has fallen on hard times and is now attempting to woo the fags on weekends. As of Friday, the strategy seemed to be failing miserably. And the bar is from hell. Surly staff, $3.25 for a Rolling Rock, and no crowd. Except for the straight redneck holdovers who looked as if they’d been clustered at the same table for the past ten years or so. I opted for a hasty retreat.

 

Drove to the Raleigh and Durham with mom on Friday as well. I’d probably have seen more and done more alone, but it seemed a good “quality time” moment, and was actually a nice break between trips to the hospital.

Tonight brought the big family gathering and dinner. Tons of food and most of the assorted relatives. It was nice, and I’m impressed that my mom managed to pull it off after yesterday.

Today also brought the first mild debauchery of the trip. I’ll skip that detail for right now, but suffice to say UNCG did it for me again…

    

The day before I left, we headed to Mt. Airy, birthplace of Andy Griffith and model for Mayberry. Oddly enough, I’d never been there before despite living most of my life about 45 miles away. Neat place, but they are completely shameless in their exploitation of the Mayberry theme. There’s a Snappy Lunch (which actually predates the show and was really one of Andy Griffith’s hangouts), as well as a Blue Bird Diner, Floyd’s Barber Shop, and Goober’s Filling Station (all “after the fact”).

 

Leaving Greensboro was rough. I have to admit to suppressing a few sobs as I headed for I-85; it’s rough leaving Mom and Dad. Unlike many people who move to SF, I wasn’t running from them. I actually like my parents. It’s Greensboro I was running from. The place just bugs the crap out of me for some reason. No doubt there will be more on this subject later.

So of course I never got in touch with Adam or Daniel and I feel most guilty, but it was a bit of a crazy week. There’s still Christmas, I guess…

Pittsburgh to Baltimore

On the morning of my departure, I got the whirlwind tour of downtown and a few more skyline views. It’s a very compact but bustling downtown district in the “triangle” formed by the Ohio, Allegheny, and Monongahela Rivers. A big centerpiece is the much-praised PPG Plaza, which is actually a sterile post-modern nightmare, David cited a reference describing it as as ” a drag queen on acid’s version of a disco in Oz”. Amazingly fitting, I must say…

 

There was fog and drizzle all around as I left, and Pittsburgh started looking like a more and more viable alternative to SF. But I’ll reserve judgment on that…

 

On the way in, I experienced that special joy which is the Pennsylvania Turnpike in the rain. I stopped at one of the oldest service plazas on the pike. There was even a historical marker; I was impressed, despite the fact that it was originally a Howard Johnsons Restaurant was not mentioned.

 

I didn’t realize that it had been nigh onto ten years since Risa and I saw each other. Regular email contact has that effect. But it was good getting back together.

Baltimore is one of my favorite underrated cities in the US. Of course, I’m supposed to stress that I was staying In Westminster, not Baltimore. I awoke to fields and horse-related smells rather than urban blight and decay. But we did go to Baltimore, even though I could have stood to spend more time there.

Pittsburgh

  

Morning number one (and morning number two for that matter) was a good excuse for breakfast at Ritter’s, a classic Pittsburgh diner. Thus fed, we proceeded to tour the entire city, bridge to bridge, tunnel to tunnel, and neighborhood to neighborhood. A good bit of this happened on foot, which was a blessing after too many days in the car.

 

I was particularly fond of the Strip District, which is an old market and industrial area which has not yet completely succumbed to gentrification. There are still markets and warehouses and factories around, although the coffee shops and trendy bars are starting to pop up.

One particular building here just sent me into fits of ecstasy for some reason. It was formerly the Armstrong Cork factory, and is now abandoned and just waiting to be taken over. Too bad that it will probably be ruined by some developer who will clean it up and make it all nice and pretty for new upscale tenants. But I love it as is it is, in all its faded glory.

Another favorite was the Hill District, once Pittsburgh’s own little Harlem, with theatres and clubs, and restaurants. Now, it’s pretty much a standard urban ghetto, but it’s still possible to catch glimpses of what used to be.

 

I decided that the south side Mount Washington area would be the place I’d most likely end up living if I moved to the city (which is not as unlikely as it might sound). But I’d most likely find myself doing a lot of boy-watching around Pitt and Carnegie-Mellon as well. Of course, there’s a lot to be said for Shadyside and Oakland too…

Late afternoon activities centered around the university area: bookstores, boy-watching, the Cathedral of Learning and more. The campuses of Pitt and Carnegie-Mellon are more or less on top of each other and they make for a lively urban area. The bookstore at Pitt is a wonderful thing, which has not yet been taken over by a chain.

  

At twilight, there was Schenley Park. The “cruising park”. Hmmm. Of course there was a visit. I was amazed; it was mobbed. The proximity to the universities and the easy automobile accessibility are definite pluses as far as the crowd goes. Nice trials. Nice collection of people. I might never have to hit a bar.

Actually, I could not tell you about the bars. That’s on hold for a more lengthy visit. It didn’t seem a priority for this trip, although I remain curious.

 

Detroit to Pittsburgh

OK…it was more or less only a place I was supposed to spend a night sleeping, and only won out over Cleveland because I was offered a place to stay. But I liked Pittsburgh so much I allowed myself to get a full day off schedule for the first time so far just because it was so cool here.

 

This is in marked contrast to Ohio, which I will specifically describe as one of the most unpleasant places on the tour so far. Toledo was such a traffic and construction snarled hellhole that I didn’t even stop to get money or food before getting on the overpriced Ohio Turnpike. Of course, as it turns out, there are NO ATM’s along the pike, despite the distressing number of Hardee’s. This made getting off said turnpike a very interesting experience as I had about two bucks in my pocket at the time. I now owe the state of Ohio three dollars. It’s a good thing there was no comment card attached to the citation. All in all, I’d just as soon skip Ohio next time, crappy turnpike and all.

 

But I did love Pittsburgh, once I finally arrived! It’s a beautiful place; with the rivers and the hills and the trees, it easily rivals San Francisco as far as the natural setting goes. In fact, the addition of actual trees and greenery affords Pittsburgh a beauty which is almost impossible to find anywhere in California.

As I drove in, on the winding highways cut between the hills and the rivers and saw that the actual city was pretty damned cool too, I realized that one night wouldn’t be enough. Fortunately, David, my host, was amenable to this idea. The fact that the Goodyear blimp was in town to honor my arrival made it all the more special. Obviously, the city really took my visit to heart.

 

Fifty years ago, the steel industry ruled Pittsburgh and it had a reputation as perhaps the ugliest and most unpleasant place in the USA. Maybe that’s why I liked it so much. Actually, I didn’t catch much evidence of the former steel domination. What I did see were great neighborhoods, interesting buildings, and the boys of the University of Pittsburgh (some of the most visually appealing of the trip so far). Apparently, the writers who so despised Pittsburgh were unable to see past the smoke and soot which used to be everywhere.

   

I guess there’s nothing really specifically spectacular about the place. I just liked it. The geography offers a great setting for the town and the mountains and rivers divide it into quite manageable village-like areas. It was good that I had a guide, or Pittsburgh might have been damned near indecipherable, my geography degree notwithstanding. A host who provides topographical maps is always a good thing.

The Itinerary

The itinerary describes the trip as it actually occurred, and includes all changes made on the road, including the elimination of Phoenix, San Diego, and Fresno. But here’s the original, if you’re that curious…

Tuesday 2 September (Reno):

  • Route: Leave San Francisco on I-80 eastbound through Sacramento to Reno.
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goals: Finding the cool dyke I met while she was working at Subway in Winnemucca five years ago, and comparing Reno’s cheap buffets to those in Vegas.

Wednesday 3 September (Salt Lake City):

  • Route: Continue on I-80 to Salt Lake City (two nights).
  • Accommodations: Coutesy of Eric.
  • Goals: Obtaining an Osmonds lunchbox. Maybe a T-shirt too…
  • Obscure TV Reference: Donny and Marie.

Friday 5 September (Denver):

  • Route: Continue on I-80 through Cheyenne, switching to I-25, headed for Denver (one night).
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goal: Not running out of gas between SLC and Cheyenne.
  • Obscure TV Reference: Dynasty.

Saturday 6 September (Kansas City):

  • Route: I-80 to Kansas City (two nights).
  • Accommodations: I’ve been offered lodging by Bernie and dinner with Gary.
  • Goals: Managing to get through the whole visit with no references to Dorothy or “The Wizard of Oz”, and visiting Country Club Plaza, which was more or less the first suburban shopping center in America.
  • Obscure TV Reference: Lots of Cops episodes, Mama’s Family.

Monday 8 September (St. Louis):

  • Route: East on I-70/US40 to St. Louis (one night).
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goals: Never spent any time here. It intrigues me. I want to check out a few Route 66 landmarks, like Ted Drewe’s Frozen Custard. If memory serves correctly, this is also the first place I get to eat White Castle Burgers.

Tuesday 9 September (Madison):

  • Route: I-55 (old Route 66) north to Peoria, I-39 north to Madison (two nights)
  • Accommodations: Chez Steven.
  • Goals: Last time I drove through Madison, all I did was buy a Coke and a Kit-Kat bar. I plan to eat better this time. A side trip to Milwaukee is very likely at this point in the trip.
  • Obscure TV Reference: Happy Days, Laverne and Shirley

Thursday 11 September (Chicago):

  • Route: I-94 east to Chicago (two nights)
  • Accommodations: Staying with Joseph. Visiting Curt.
  • Goals: My last trip to Chicago didn’t do it justice. Buildings…the el…White Castle…the South Side…Big Chicks (the bar)…
  • Obscure TV Reference: Good Times, Bob Newhart

Saturday 13 September (Indianapolis):

  • Route: South on I-55/Route 66 to Peoria and west on I-74 to Indianapolis (three nights).
  • Accommodations: Here I visit Bob, to whom I am eternally indebted for suggesting the trip in the first place.
  • Goal: Rumor has it Indianapolis is a roadside archtecture mecca, with a smattering of interesting historic districts as well.
  • Obscure TV Reference: One Day at a Time

Tuesday 16 September (Detroit):

  • Route: Switch north on I-69 (I’m excited about this particular highway) through Fort Wayne to I-94 and Detroit (two nights).
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goal: I really want to see this place; my friend Rae (a native) loves it, plus I just have this fetish for urban decay. Auto-culture exhibits at the Henry Ford Museum. A WOWO bumper sticker and T-shirt.

Thursday 18 September (Pittsburgh):

  • Route: South on I-94 to Toledo, east on I-90 to Cleveland and west on I-76 to Pittsburgh (one night).
  • Accommodations: A last minute offer from David (I LOVE people named David) has resulted in accommodations and a Mac here.
  • Goal: I’ve known an awful lot of people from Pittsburgh over the years. Hopefully it will not be obvious why they left.
  • Obscure TV Reference: Mister Rogers Neighborhood

Saturday 20 September (Baltimore):

  • Route: East on I-70 (veering onto US 40, the old National Road) to Charles Town and Harpers Ferry. Then on to Baltimore (two nights).
  • Accommodations: Risa, the only high school friend with whom I still communicate is here.
  • Goal: Cruising the Giant Foods near Johns Hopkins, recapturing my childhood and photographing motels in Charles Town and Harper’s Ferry. And I love Baltimore. There may be a side trip to Washington and/or Wilmington.
  • Obscure TV Reference: Homicide: Life on the Street

Monday 22 September (Greensboro):

  • Route: South on I-95 through Washington to Richmond. West in I-64 to Norfolk to visit Taylor, and then onto Greensboro via US 58 and I-85.
  • Accommodations: Mom and Dad. Plus I get to hang out with Jeff and Adam and Daniel and Taylor.
  • Goal: Very much rest. Very little driving. Babylon, Waffle House, K&W, Libby Hill. Cruising UNCG. Side trips to Myrtle Beach, Reidsville, and hopefully the North Carolina State Fair in Raleigh.
  • Obscure TV Reference: The Andy Griffith Show.

Tuesday 30 September (Charlotte):

  • Route: South on I-85 to Charlotte.
  • Accommodations: Duncan.
  • Goal: Gus’ Sir Beef, my first Krystal burger.
  • Obscure TV Reference: The PTL Club.

Tuesday 30 September (Atlanta):

  • Route: South on I-85 to Atlanta (one night).
  • Accommodations: Tony.
  • Goal: Krystal Burgers, Krispy Kreme Doughnuts, and Little Five Points call.
  • Obscure TV Reference: Matlock, Gone with the Wind (OK…it’s not a TV show, but I couldn’t skip it…)

Thursday 2 October (Memphis):

  • Route: West on I-20 to Birmingham, north on US 78 through Tupelo (the Elvis birthplace) to Memphis (one night).
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goal: Graceland? Beale Street? The National Civil Rights Museum?
  • Obscure TV Reference: In the Heat of the Night (Mississppi leg only…)

Friday 3 October (Oklahoma City):

  • Route: West on I-40 (detouring onto Route 66) to Oklahoma City (two nights).
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goal: Many many Route 66 sights. The seduction of a member of Oral Roberts’ family.

Saturday 4 October (Amarillo):

  • Route: West on I-40 (more Route 66 detours) to Amarillo (one night).
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goal: Cadillac Ranch.

Sunday 5 October (Gallup):

  • Route: West on I-40 (with yet more Route 66 detours) through Albuquerque to Gallup.
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goal: The hidden cities of Route 66.

Monday 6 October (Kingman):

  • Route: West on I-40, through Holbrook (home of the Wigwam Village Motel) and Flagstaff, to Kingman (one night).
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goal: More hidden cities of Route 66.
  • Obscure TV Reference: Route 66.

Tuesday 7 October (Bakersfield):

  • Route: West on I-40/Route 66 through Barstow and Needles to Bakersfield.
  • Accommodations: Motel.
  • Goal: Making it through the desert without a dead grandma in the back of the truck (per Steinbeck).

Then back to San Francisco, where by this time I will most likely be homeless. OK…just kidding…