Upon Hitting Age 36

Realizations upon hitting age 36:

  • Any email message which states “this is not spam” invariably is.
  • Most people will never realize that the same logic which states “Windows is the most popular operating system, therefore it’s the best” would also suggest that McDonald’s is the most fabulous restaurant in the world.
  • I will probably never do anything which will get me in the history books and I’m probably glad.
  • I will probably never have a live-in boyfriend and I’m definitely glad.
  • There are approximately five other people on the planet who share my fascination with old supermarkets and I’ve probably spoken with at least four of them already.
  • San Francisco will never again seem as exciting to me as it did in 1992 or even 1996.
  • Los Angeles is not really such a bad place.
  • Neither is Richmond, Virginia.
  • I still like Chicago and Detroit better.
  • There will always be yuppies, no matter what the currently fashionable term. They will always be annoying. And they will always be an easy target.
  • I will probably not wake up this morning to find a 21-inch monitor has mysteriously appeared on my doorstep and just as mysteriously has managed not to be stolen.
  • I do not get tired of The Simpsons no matter how many times I’ve seen each and every episode. And I’ve seen them all very many times.
  • I cannot say the same thing about “Third Rock from the Sun”.
  • I will always feel just a little insecure and just a tad melancholy right around my birthday.
  • Not to mention just a touch self-indulgent.

Birthday bash tonight at Tad’s Steaks on Powell Street. We get in the $8.59 steak line at 8PM.