A healthcare system that requires you to go before a magistrate and swear out involuntary commitment papers and then have her picked up by the police in order to get an 81-year-old woman some emergency help is certifiably fucking broken.
Yes, I have other things on my mind right now but I wanted to get this down while I’m still in “pissed off” mode. God only knows what emotion comes next.
The week from hell now being more or less over, my mom is in a facility in High Point awaiting a possible move to one closer to home. My dad is coping as best he can; I think I underestimated how much of an effect this would have on him. And I’m back at my desk with a pile of deferred work, thinking that after two miserable Christmas seasons in a row I’m pretty much ready to say “the hell with it” as far as the holidays are concerned from here on out.
But I’ll make this valiant effort anyway, even though my heart ain’t in it:
All that said, I’m generally feeling better about life than I was a few days ago. Actually having gotten some sleep helps a lot, as does not worrying about what “Mom crisis” I’ll be confronted with his morning–or worse, at 10:00 tonight. I even found myself happily singing along with some BB Brunes song last night on the way home from visiting her–even though I had no earthly fucking idea what I was singing (my French is rusty). I also started on something else rather positive last night that I shan’t mention just now.
So there’s hope.
Note to everyone who’s emailed, texted, and called over the past few days: Thanks. It’s really been nuts and I haven’t had time to acknowledge everyone yet, but I really do appreciate it.
I am excited at the prospect of actually having a weekend next weekend.
For the past month or so, the majority of my non-work related conversations have been about my mom. As someone who is not really inclined toward telephone conversations to begin with, having several of them a day with my relatives about a fairly unpleasant subject has not been my idea of heaven. I love my mom (and my dad and my aunts) dearly and really appreciate all the assistance and advice they’ve offered but I’m pretty thoroughly “talked out” on the subject of my mom by now. I’m not really avoiding it (it’s too important and I really sort of can’t avoid it) but I’m kind of ready to stop letting it dominate my life–and my website.
In other words, despite its major role in my life right now I’m not willing to be so completely defined by my mom’s illness– just like I wasn’t willing to be defined by my assorted health issues in 2001 and 2006, my breakup earlier this year, etc.
Therefore, I’m opening the floor to new subjects now. Any suggestions?
When confronted with an impending unpleasant evening and bad mood, never underestimate the curative power of some inappropriate lunchtime conversation with your coworkers followed by some Petula Clark.