Journals : 2003 : Outtakes 2003-2004

As I cycle through the couple of hundred channels available to me on the satellite, I sometimes think back to what it was like having cable in Greensboro in the 1970s. It was, shall we say, not quite so intense an experience. It was also not the near-universal thing that having a cable or satellite hookup is today...

The earliest version of cable I remember, from about 30 years ago, brought us the four local stations (ABC, CBS, NBC, and PBS affiliates), two stations from Raleigh (an ABC and an NBC affiliate), and one non-broadcast channel which comprised of a black and white camera panning across several weather gauges while a local radio station played in the background. Seven channels: six broadcast and one filler...

A couple of years later, the two Raleigh stations were replaced by an independent station and an ABC affiliate from Charlotte. The former was heavy on really old sitcom reruns and movies, while the latter was more or less a carbon copy of our local ABC station except for the fact that they ran the network news at 6:00 rather than 6:30. The weather gauges with the radio station stayed put...

It got even more complicated about 1976, with the addition of two independent stations from (drum roll please...) Washington DC, which left me in the neviable position of being able to watch Brady Bunch reruns three times a day. Shortly afterward, TBS (then known as WTCG, Channel 17 in Atlanta) and HBO appeared, and the black and white weather gauges were replaced by a teletype-style AP newsfeed (with the same local radio station in the background). Cable still consisted, however, of about ten channels...

Greensboro didn't actually get "expanded" cable until 1984, so I managed to miss the earliest years of the MTV invasion. By this time, the strange assortment of broadcast stations and the weather gauge/news teletype were also gone, and cable was never quite the same...

15 September 2003

No matter how much some people want to rationalize it, claims that "CDs cost too much" or rants that "big corporations do not market sufficiently interesting music" do not make downloading copyrighted music without paying for it any less illegal or unethical...

I've done it, you've done it, and millions of other people have done it. And I agree that CDs cost too much and that major corporations do not market sufficiently interesting music. But let's not delude ourselves into thinking we have the moral high ground here...

No one would really suggest that the fact that Safeway charges too much for ground beef and does not carry my favorite cereal would not be sufficient justification for my decision to steal a few cans of strained beets, now would they?

Not, of course, that I'd steal strained beets even if I was starving to death (in which case it still wouldn't be justified)...

• Pat Robertson says that God believes homosexuals are evil. Thus, homosexuals are evil and should be beaten up or ostracized or (at the absolute minimum) relegated to second-class citizenship on Pat's say-so.
• Reverend Oates says that God says it's a sin to dance or go to the movies. Thus, all who do so are doomed to hell and must be made to pay.
• Jim Bakker says that God wants him to have a nice house and a fancy car and a theme park, so we must scarifice having nice things (or financial security) ourselves and supply all of Jim's needs.

• The Guardian says that paying an extra quarter for bus fare will be the end of democracy, so not protesting the fare hike is tantamount to treason.
• Critcal Mass states that bicycling is the most environmenatlly-friendly form of transportation, so anyone who doesn't use a bike every day is something close to criminal.
• PETA says that animal testing is equivalent to the Holocaust, so it's OK to bomb a building and maybe kill off a few Jews and Gentiles as long as the cute, fuzzy bunnies are OK.

5 December 2003

Ah, discount stores from the 1960s. They just aren't the same anymore...

In Greensboro, our lineup included Clark's (later Cook's), followed by King's, Kmart, and Zayre. I remember when each and every one closed; King's and Cook's gave up while I was in high school, and Zayre (which became Ames for a few years right near the end) lasted until just before I moved to San Francisco. Kmart is still there -- sort of -- but it's down to one dumpy store from a high of four or five...

Of course, we also had Sears and Penney's and Ward's, which didn't really qualify. And there were Rose's and Woolworth's and Grant's, which were just dimestores...

In the 1980s, we also picked up (briefly) a Memco and a Bradlees, neither of which did very well. Memco was the east coast version of Gemco, a membershp department and grocery store owned by Lucky Stores of California. It was a block from my house so I went there a lot...

We never had a Woolco nor a Richway nor a TG&Y, but the former two were available in Charlotte and the latter was in Reidsville. I'd also never really shopped at Wal-Mart until I moved to Myrtle Beach in 1986; they waited until the 1990s to inavde larger cities like my hometown...

20 August 2004

Mark and I were discussing this as we drove around LA last weekend, and I'm glad someone else said it too (although I've since lost the link):

Mocking is the local humor of the Hub, a daily badinage of the streets and schools, offices and shops, designed to deflate pretension. In San Francisco, it almost certainly is against the law. The Bostonian who in 'Frisco mocks, faces a suit for creating a hostile workplace. "San Franciscans just don't understand irony," says Michael Shea, a Fillmore resident who is just about to move back to the Hub. "You have to explain that you're joking -- and that ruins the joke."

Of course, mocking can be cruel and adolescent, but it's often refreshing. Weirdly enough in this age of political correctness and super-sensitivity, it's San Francisco, once wide-open and wild, that is now stuffier than staid old, uniform-wearing Boston.

Los Angeles has a sense of humor about itself. New York has a sense of humor about itself. Even Cleveland has a sense of humor about itself. San Francisco has no sense of humor about itself. Hell, San Francisco has no sense of humor about ANYTHING. Maybe it once had one and lost it sometime during the 1970s when its mood ring changed to the wrong color. Who knows?

New Yorkers who make jokes about their city become famous comedians and actors. Angelenos who joke about their city produce successful movies like "L.A. Story" and record very memorable music. Oddly enough, no one questions their love for the place they call home, depsite their wilingness and ability to crack a good joke at its expense.

Crack a joke about San Francisco, on the other hand, and the "locals" (almost none of whom are actually FROM San Francisco) will question whether you "deserve" to live in such a wonderful and "tolerant" place, what with your heart being so heavy with hate and all.

It's a sign of insecurity reiniscent of mid-sized cities like Charlotte and Fresno and Orlando, places which want so very desperately to join the grand, upper tier of cities. There can be no humor nor irony, whether printed, spoken, or even architectural. Descriptions of the city must be hushed and reverent, and magazine ads tasteful, dignified, and subdued. Buildings must be monuments for the ages rather than temporary servers of a purpose, particularly if that purpose is crass commercialism. And please, Mr. Editor, remember that just plain "Charlotte" will suffice, the added "North Carolina" being an unnecessary modifier for a "world class" city like ours.

We. Must. Be. Taken. Seriously.

San Francisco's problem is similar, but not identical, in that our city wants desperately to RETURN to the elite circle of "cities that matter" after having been banished three or four decades back. We're sort of like Fredo Corleone, the overshadowed older sibling who can't get over the fact that he really has no place at the main table anymore, so he just gets drunk a lot and uses bizarre behavior to beg for attention.

8 September 2004

In today's Chronicle:

Her recent marriage cut her food-stamp allowance in half, to $200 a month, which ran out this weekend so she didn't have any breakfast in the house Tuesday as her kids waited for her to walk them the seven blocks to school. Maybe they can have free breakfasts at Markham, Fite said, something they had at Burbank.

Antonio had on gleaming white Nike Air Jordans, and Audea wore new pink and black Converse Chuck Taylors as well as new jeans with designer stitching, clothes Fite said she buys so her kids don't get picked on.

I know it's too easy a target, but dammit, don't you think the kids might be better off being FED first, even if it means they might get picked on at school? Jesus Christ. Of course, the last sentence in the first paragraph is the key: she's expecting the school (in other words, you and me) to provide lunch for her kids. And ultimately, we'll do it...

Why? Because the United States continues to defy logic by providing incentives for people to have children...