Year: 2005

Iran So Far Away

Any and all opinions on the idea of a Jewish state in Palenstine aside, why do people seem so shocked and surprised when confronted with the fact that there’s a psycho running Iran. It’s not like this is anything new. I have trouble remembering a time when there WASN’T a psycho running Iran…

Stupid Christian Tricks

Driving down Monroe Road today, I came across this woman in a big-ass SUV (surprise!) who was driving like an utter maniac. She was repeatedly tailgating people at 60 – 65 MPH (in a 45 MPH zone), cutting people off left and right, and generally causing chaos wherever she went…

I happened to pull up behind her at a stoplight and I noticed her two bumper stickers: one a Bush-Cheney sticker and one reading “engage your faith” or some such nonsense, with this URL at the bottom…

What I wanted to ask her was if it was her “faith” that was causing her to drive so recklessly and put so many people’s lives and well-being at risk. Maybe she figured that by knocking off a few, she’d allow them to see God a little sooner and would thus be doing them a great favor…

But I bet if you asked her, she’d claim to be fiercely pro-life. As is the case with so many fundamentalists, her actions don’t quite mesh with her lofty beliefs…

Ah, life in the Bible Belt:

If someone greets me with “Feliz Navidad” or anything else other than “Merry Christmas” this season, I will kindly answer them with “Merry Christmas.” I truly believe to say anything else would offend Christ.

Sherry Jarrell

Of COURSE Jesus would be offended. English was, after all, God’s official language, even before anyone was speaking it here on Earth. That’s why the Bible was originally written in English. Old English, specifically. And that’s why he only understands your prayers if you say “thou” and “thine” instead of “you” and “yours”…

 

Inconsistency

It’s been suggested that since I’m not a believer, I might want to steer clear of theology. But I’m not a hippie granola either, and I always felt comfortable pointing out THEIR inconsistencies when I was in SF. Now that I’m here in the land of the scary fundamentalists, it’s only natural I should pursue the most logical and available local targets…

Besides, I’m better acquainted with the Bible than a large proportion of the so-called “faithful” anyway, having actually READ it and all…

Persecution Complex

Couldn’t have said it better myself:

What’s offensive — also surreal and absurd — is the notion that Christianity, a faith claimed by 76% of all Americans, is somehow being intimidated into nonexistence. Some of the earliest Christians were stoned for their beliefs. In some parts of the world today, Christianity is a crime punishable by death. And the AFA is feeling persecuted because a salesclerk says “Happy holidays”?

That’s not persecution. It’s a persecution complex.

Pearls Before Swine

I know a lot of you get it in your local newspaper, because it’s one of those strips which inexplicably showed up just about everywhere in the country almost overnight. And I cannot, for the life of me, understand WHY. Does anyone really think Pearls Before Swine is funny? Or that it has any discernible point at all?

Am I just missing something here?

Things Fall Apart

Good morning, Midnight. It’s Christmas:

My boyfriend said, “It’s really sweet the way you go for Christmas cheer.”

I said, “We can’t afford the tree.”

He said, “Love is free.”

So we trimmed the cactus with my earrings that we’d meant to pawn.

I’d almost forgotten that it was time for my annual posting of the official Otherstream Christmas anthem…