Category: Stupidity

In case you had any doubt

A healthcare system that requires you to go before a magistrate and swear out involuntary commitment papers and then have her picked up by the police in order to get an 81-year-old woman some emergency help is certifiably fucking broken.

Yes, I have other things on my mind right now but I wanted to get this down while I’m still in “pissed off” mode. God only knows what emotion comes next.

Randomly Friday

While watching “Cops” and hoping the phone won’t ring again with another relative telling me another horror story:

  • Whatever remaining childhood was left in your world disappears instantly as you start comparing nursing homes continuing care facilities for your mom.
  • Realizing that you’re probably going to be the one making the entire decision, without even much input from your dad, does in fact make it worse.
  • Ice cream doesn’t make it all better. But it doesn’t hurt, either.
  • Speaking of childhood, Rob Ford, alleged mayor of Toronto, is acting like a spoiled, pouting eight-year-old and I feel it is my duty to make sure that Americans start laughing at him as much as (I hope) Canadians are.
  • Speaking of Toronto, this is an interesting blog that I found, oddly enough, through an article about DC.
  • Disturbing statement I just heard on TV: “I could totally go to sleep with this thing around my neck.” (I think it was a commercial for some kind of pillow.)

I’ll try to get back to rock and roll en français soon since I seem to do that better than anything else lately.

Stupid bee

We’ve already established that I was an indoorsy, bookish sort of child. I didn’t play outside any more than was absolutely required by my keepers. Thus I never had to deal much with bee stings and the like. In fact, tonight’s was maybe my second or third ever.

It happened as I was changing the lightbulb in the porch light. Just as I pulled off the cover, I felt the intense pain. It took a second to sink in and then I yelled “shit” really loudly so all the neighbors could hear. After that, I ran into the house and grabbed the iPad to Google what the fuck I was supposed to do–which provided surprisingly inaccurate results, several of which just led to the Target Pharmacy website.

Anyhow, I determined that there seemed to be no stinger to remove (which is good since I had no idea how the hell I was supposed to remove it) and I took an illicit Ibuprofen and a Benadryl. Eventually the spot cooled down, and the pain was gone after a few minutes. My left hand feels a little sensitive still, though.

The point behind all this is that the Internet has probably been the salvation of many a helpless, clueless geek such as myself in similarly ridiculous and basically nonthreatening situations. The other point is that I still hate the great outdoors and always will, and I’m increasingly anxious for the day that I will no longer have even so small a piece of it as a yard.

Ring twice

It’s kind of quaintly anachronstic to say that I’m sitting at home on Saturday morning waiting for the postman. It’s also kind of a pain in the ass because I have other things I’d rather be doing.

I’m waiting here because there’s something coming that I’ll have to sign for and it will be an even bigger pain in the ass if I miss delivery and have to go in and pick it up next week. Since I live and work thirty miles apart, and since the post office closes at 5:00, it’s not like I can just pop over on my lunch hour. I’m addition to waiting in the interminable line and interacting with the rude, surly postal workers, I’d also have to take time off from work.

All of which is indicative of why the postal service is in trouble now. The fact that it makes even its premium services like Express Mail so inconvenient through limited hours, etc. demonstrates why FedEx and UPS are winning that battle. At least they manage to keep some staff on hand so you can pick up a fucking envelope after work.

Yeah, I realize that postal rants are just too easy, but it’s been a while since I did one.

Rethink this one?

I’m really not the patriotic and easily offended sort.

But…

On this particular weekend, it strikes me as not in the best of taste–and also pretty fucking creepy–to have an air show going on that involves lots of really loud, low-flying planes that can be heard all over town.

Winston-Salem 10th most fun, affordable city in U.S.

According to Business Week, that is.

Here’s why I hate stupid non-news stories like this:

  • They use questionable methodology.
  • They use inaccurate or irrelevant or inconsistent data.
  • They’re stupid, non-news stories and I don’t really need any further justification.

That said, I wonder if our ranking would have gone up or down if they’d included Winston-Salem’s actual population (229,617) rather than some random number (33,822) that came from…well…I don’t know where it might have come from.

Remember when reputable publications used to have things like editors and fact checkers? And writers, for that matter?

You expect people to go to the bathroom in their living rooms?

From an article in the Charlotte Observer last week:

An apparently intoxicated employee of Rock City Tavern was arrested using the bathroom on the roof of the business early Thursday morning, police say.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but he was arrested specifically because he was not using the bathroom. If there had been an actual bathroom on the roof, and if he had been using that, there wouldn’t have been a problem.

The issue here, though, was that he was urinating someplace other than a bathroom. Thus he was not “using the bathroom” at all.

Got it? Good.

What a fucking dipshit

Morrissey stands by Norway comments:

Before starting his track Meat Is Murder, the former The Smiths star told the crowd, “We all live in a murderous world, as the events in Norway have shown… Though that is nothing compared to what happens in McDonald’s and Kentucky Fried S**t every day.”